So today is super windy and dusty and i woke up feeling horrible because of it...ugh...i can't stand days like this...i obviously am more a fan of nice and perfect weather..but who isn't haha
my mind is so blank right now...i have felt like that a lot lately and i hate it...i find myself thinking constantly about the things in my life i dont approve of..and then letting it get the best of me..and the way i have been dealing with it is basically shutting down...shutting the things out of my mind hoping they will stay away forever..but they dont...never do...there are so many things to look forward to...i wish those were the only things filing through my mind...ugh is it possible to only remember the good and never the bad? that just seems so unrealistic doesn't it?
tonight my mom, older sister, and two nephews are coming into town..mom is moving here permanently but my older sister and nephews will be here a week. So ya i am super excited to get to spend some fun times with them. my family has always been there for me and has been one of the only constant things in my life....i am very blessed to have such a strong family base...and i really do treasure that...i never want to take that for granted...no sir...
i guess what i am really waiting on is someone to come into my life who is gracious, mature, interesting, and many many other things..someone who has the potential to start something great with...i'm done with the petty, immature, pointlessness in my life...i have already had enough of it in my life..not sure there is even room left for more...i think that is why i feel blank most of the time...i'm done with and hoping to get rid of what makes me feel that way...lately my prayers have all been sounding the same...they are pretty much on repeat...
none of us know for certain what will happen tomorrow or next week or even next year for that matter..in fact i am unsure of pretty much everything in my life. One thing that i am not unsure of is Him....in fact he is the only thing i am sure of...the only thing i have ever been sure of.
Proverbs 18:10 THE NAME OF THE LORD IS A STRONG TOWER, THE RIGHTEOUS RUN TO IT AND ARE SAFE.
when i think of this i feel secure and stable, because i know that no matter how messed up this world is..or the relationships going on in it...God will forever be right and strong and true...and i never want to let the negative make me forget that feeling...He is the rock that keeps us all standing when all we want to do is give up...
Love,
Bethany
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So, so you think you can tell Heaven from Hell,
blue skies from pain.
Can you tell a green field from a cold steel rail?
A smile from a veil?
Do you think you can tell?
And did they get you to trade your heroes for ghosts?
Hot ashes for trees?
Hot air for a cool breeze?
Cold comfort for change?
And did you exchange a walk on part in the war for a lead role in a cage?
How I wish, how I wish you were here.
We're just two lost souls swimming in a fish bowl, year after year,
Running over the same old ground.
What have you found? The same old fears.
Wish you were here.
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